Let Me Show You Something about Us (Wives)

Let Me Show You Something about Us (Wives)    

You need to upgrade your sense of humor to accept these jokes, no hurt feeling are allowed.

THEY ARE YOURS
A couple drove down a country road for several  miles,not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As  they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked  sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'
'Yep,' the wife replied,  'in-laws.'


OUR WORD(S) 
A  husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a  day...  30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, 'The reason has  to be because we have to repeat everything to men...
The husband  then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?' 

HOW GOD MADE US
A man said to his wife one day, 'I  don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the  same time.
' The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.
God made me  beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
 
WHO DOES  WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, 'You should do  it, because you get up first,  and then we don't have to wait as  long to get our coffee.'  
The husband said, ' You are in charge of  cooking around here and  you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.'
Wife replies, 'No, you should  do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the  coffee.'
Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.' 
So  she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him  at the top of several pages, that it indeed says..........'HEBREWS'

WE FOLLOW YOU
A man  and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the  next day,  he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. 
Not wanting to be the first to  break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, 'Please  wake me at 5:00 AM ..' 
He left it where he knew she would find  it.. 
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00  AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of  paper by  the bed. 
The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM . Wake up.' Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
 
("Writing is the way to the human heart." - Richard Wright)